The Bonkers World Of Beauty: Lipstick and Logic (New Series!)

xo, kirsteen

So. lipstick and logic??? Have you ever stood in front of a mirror and thought WTF have I done to my eyebrows, they are looking like defunct windscreen wipers and not at all where they were when I last looked? Have you ever been an eager beaver with a lip pencil and had lips like an overinflated bouncy castle trying to calm down? Or maybe you tried a new waxing salon and vowed never to return given trainee was as much use as a ice pick in the Sahara? Well my little cupcake, whatever your experience in the quest for beauty, you’ve got to admit, it is damn funny!

Welcome to a new comedy, The Bonkers World of Beauty, an 11-part mini blog series which will include hilarious topics such as 50 shades of self tanning, what men really think of women’s changing rooms, and how to negotiate tomato soup in your favorite white shirt!

When you take time to stand back and observe the comedy of life, little gems appear from everywhere. And beauty is no exception! Let’s dive in! Andiamo…

And logic?

A red lipstick to a woman is like a BBQ to a man, from zero to hero at lightning speed. A man’s BBQ is his caveman connection back to masculinity! And the lipstick? Well, it is the reason he abandons the hunt and rushes home to the cave LOL.

And that red lipstick isn’t the only thing that has caveman in a tizz and temporarily abandoning his beloved BBQ, it is the associating of risk and danger and tread carefully that lures him in (just ask tomato soup LOL!).

Lipstick sure does pack a punch…just ask JLO!

ON A BAD DAY, THERE IS ALWAYS LIPSTICK
AUDREY HEPBURN

7 ways a lipstick can change anyone’s day.

A red lipstick has phenomenal pulling power to the mouth! If you want your husband to listen to you ladies…slap it on!
There is no shade like red for making those teeth look white and save a ton in whitening kits!
Kissing a gentleman passionately without that lipstick moving is, quite frankly, worthy of an Olympic medal! Pat yourself on the back!
A red lipstick can disarm any stuffy boardroom chat and bring focus (even if it’s not for the right reason).
A red lipstick has the power to halt one conversation and begin another!
It is a fabulous distraction in any intellectually challenged Zoom meeting!
One lipstick can seal memories forever more. Make it a good one!

On my solo travel trails over the years, I’ve been disciplined in what I carry, and that includes makeup. You wouldn’t believe the uses I can find with an old mascara wand LOL. But, there are some things that are truly non negotiable,. And one of them is my red Chanel lipstick. On any given day when this mailbox classic comes out, I have to admit, I feel different. And one lipstick guaranteed to get them talking? Chanel Rouge Allure L’extrait!

And finally…spare a thought for caveman, he may be all beast and brawn, and flashing moments of masculinity, but you are the one with the remote control to his BBQ…!